Seriously, pick a scenario where you wouldn't expect to feel guilty. I will prove you wrong, and feel guilty. If I go out, I feel like I should have stayed in. When I stay in I feel as though I am letting my friends down or I have FOMO and immediately know that this was the night I should have went out!
If I am too busy at work or say in a movie and someone texts me and I can't answer for a couple hours, I might as well delete the number because that person now hates me and we can never speak again. But if I was going to text them first, I can't do that. I texted first last time and the last thing I would want to be is annoying, I should have better self control!
This guilt also translates into how I feel when I do things for myself, and how much I struggle practicing self love. It is so hard for me to practice self love and not feel guilty. If I sit down on a week night to have a glass of wine *gasp* alone, I automatically assume I am on the road to alcoholism. I have trouble having a nice, long, hot bath, going for a run without Cuba or even if I text a friend to hang out. I feel like a physics project, with every action there is both an equal and opposite reaction.
There is about all I learned in physics ..
and maybe d = v/t?
So, I find ways to justify it. I find a way to equate what I want to do with what I think I should be doing. If I stay home on week nights and do adult things (clean, cook, laundry) I allow myself to go out guilt free at least ONE night of the weekend. If I get up early to go to the gym before work two morning, I can sleep in one. If I get a bath for one hour, laundry for two.
When did this happen? When did becoming an adult become the same as not being allowed to enjoy life? And why do I feel the need to justify looking after my own happiness and well being? How do we stop?
What are some of your guilty pleasures ? How do you justify them?